A kid has no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why don't dinosaurs talk anymore? Because they're all dead, duh. :P

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

thumb_up thumb_down +31

knock knock Dave's not here.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Women's Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops