Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

Theory: Jesus: Father why must I go die in order to defeat sin, is sin not a product of humans? God: SHHH! You want humans to know they are stronger than us? Real life: Later on the cross Jesus: FATHER WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! God: *Thunder* Moral: Makes sense... Kinda? Maybe? A bit? I honestly do not get it :(

Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey – his purse is what restrains him

What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he was alive today? Scream at the top of his lungs as he tried to punch out the top of his coffin.

Two friends go on a hunting trip together. One friend says to the other "Knock, knock." The other friend doesn't respond because he was mauled by a bear.

What did Batman say when he saw Robin? Hey look it's Robin

Why didnt jerry trip over a slug? Because jerry is an arabian and the atmosphere in arabi is to hot for a slug.

Knock knock! Who's there? The police your son died in a car crash.

What did the pencil say to the pen? Nothing.

2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

Q: What is a laptop that sings? A: A Dell

1 I've been diagnosed with-- 2 I don't give a f*ck, go die in a hole!

its's not rape if you yell "suprise!"

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

Knock, knock! Who's there? your enemy your enemy who? your nemesis who was brutally raped and murdered last nigh.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

roses are red violets are blue everyone is stupid how about you? -I'm not Im black

Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

Moby Stick, the Great White Twig

1d

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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