Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

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I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

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Why was the Asian guy dumped by his hot girlfriend? Well you know what they say about Asian guys.... They are too dedicated to their schoolwork.

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What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

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Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

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What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

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what do you call the man making meth in his basement? the police to stop inappropriate behavior from reaching the children of society.

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What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

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Q: Why did the Unicorn cross the road? A: It didn't Unicorns are fictional creatures.

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roses are red violets are blue i use refrigerators to keep my food cool

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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What do you call a dead black person? A corpse.

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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whats the difference between and clorox wipe and a paper towel? a clorox wipe is wet.

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Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

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A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops