Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

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so... how about that airplane food

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Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

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Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

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When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

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Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

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Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

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Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

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A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve

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how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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