what do you tell a woman with one black eye? "sorry about that wild ball, you played a fantastic softball game otherwise"

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Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Your doorbell is broken.

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

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What's red and curly and goes 100km an hour? Palfi in a blender

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tee hee

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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Thumbs this up

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Why did the boy die? He got shot in the face repeatedly.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Q: What comes first the chicken or the egg? A: Pineapple.

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Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

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What did the Mexican guy get for christmas? Deported

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Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

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John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

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I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

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A retarded man speaks jibberish, because he is retarded

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? According to the theory of evolution, chickens are descendent's of dinosaurs, meaning that a dinosaur laid an egg, eventually creating a chicken thus meaning that the egg came first.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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