A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

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how do you make your mom mad? mushroom stamp her face

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What's brown and smelly? Poop.

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Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

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Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

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Hi

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Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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How do you talk to a mentally challenged person? You use words in a sequential order that would make sense grammatically

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

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Can you say the word "toy boat" 10 times fast? No

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You Wanna hear an anti joke? Womens rights

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was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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whats funny? a relatsion ship for 16 hours

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What did mr smith say when a student asked for math help? ok

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- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

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- kellen says to bill "your a fruit cake" - bill say to raj "your a gypsy" - raj says to kellen "you have gingevitis" R.I.P kellen 2012

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What crime does a tree commit in order to be sent to prison? Trees on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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