What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

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Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

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I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

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What smells worse than cow manure? Burning Jews.

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what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

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What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

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I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

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This sentence is false.

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

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What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

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It is so hard to write an antijoke.

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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How do you kill a mocking bird. Shoot it.

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What is the difference between a mom and a dad? One is a mom and the other is a dad. Why couldn't Fred see the board? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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Why did the white man go to jail? He broke the law.

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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