what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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What do you call a guy who can't get a girlfriend? Me.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

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Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

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Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

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Straight men can be bronies.

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Why did the baby die? Abortion

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Kenneth kaniff takes his hat off then he meets cosmic panda with kevin the zebra because chuck norris ate a chili pepper.

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What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

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Were did Suzie go after the bombing? A: everywere

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had an extra penis.

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I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

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Person 1: Eric is in the hospital! I think it was those depression pills. Person 2: What did he overdose? Person 3: No he just took to much.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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a 5 year old rapes a pedophile

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your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

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"Hey guys lets have a standing obviation." No one else stands....

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Their, they're, there You're, your

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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