What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the sign say at Disney World? Disney World.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q:whats comes back to life and says RAR A;jesus

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

This is an inappropriate joke and is meant to make you laugh

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender does not ask about its facial characteristics, because he is wondering why there is a horse standing in his bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Luckily Captain America was able to rescue Hitler just before he was trapped in the ice for many years... Thanks to his brave efforts the war continued many more years! Captain America under ice: Why do I get the feeling I did something wrong? Hmm... 30 years later Cap: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMNNNNNN!!!!!! Moral: On ice, tickets sold out... no clothing required, ladies only, None under 16!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

h

thumb_up thumb_down +9

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

a man gets raped. -teagan doherty-

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Who is worse than Justin Bieber? Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks to a bar. The door was locked and had a closed sign so he walks away and goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I think everybody ought to have a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops