Why did the teenage boy touch himself at night? Because he was shot in the stomach by his drunken father and was trying in vain to stop the bleeding.

THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

So this guy comes into a bar... Jizz eveywhere.

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

Oh...okay, good.

Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

What has two legs, takes away your money, and causes depression? A Democrat.

Two black guys jump off a cliff, who wins? The black guy.

Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

What's worse than genital warts? Herpes. You can get rid of warts

O'Malley, an Irishman; Adam, a Jew; and Patrick, a gay man, walk into a bar. Oh crap. I just outed Patrick.

What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

E= McVagina

Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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