knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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How did the girl die? 25.

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what's shaped like a tree? a tree

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

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A blonde walks into a bar She said, agh that hurt

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Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

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What do you call a black man working for Bank of America? A successful individual.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

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What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

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Nobody doesn't like Sarah Lee. There are no humans, at all, anywhere in the world, who do not like Sarah Lee. None. Not even one. They do not exist in reality. Everyone likes Sarah Lee. Everyone.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

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69

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Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

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Asians are a lot like spongebob They're terrible at driving and good at karate.

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Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

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What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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yfygcugyuyc

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When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

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There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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