A blind man walks into a bar with a guide dog in one hand and his girlfriend in the other. The bartender says "Nice dog." The blind man says "Thanks."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's naughty and rhymes with CORN? Naughty corn.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why was the man gay? because he likes men.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I have a crush on my dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops