Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

Osama Bin Laden dies.

Don't rape me!

beiber i straight

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

Q: What is long and hard? A: The gun used to kill my parents.

Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

Q: Whats so funny about an antijoke? A: nothing

I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

Please don't rape me.

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

Penis jokes.

How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

Do you think people can change? No. They can change their mind.

What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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