knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

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A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

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Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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How many dislikes can this get?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

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Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

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Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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Real jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A Kinect

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What was the woman doing in the kitchen? Investigating a murder..

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

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whats gay ? you

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The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

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How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

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Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops