Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

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This person shaved their head to gain attention. A klansman.

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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CAN YOU FIND YOUR D I C K YET BOMBER

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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