Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

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What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

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why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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minorities

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What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

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What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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Penis.

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I'm funny.

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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a man walks into a bar and dies

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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