Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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YOLO

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Libraries.

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

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wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

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66

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

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What is as dry as a bone? A bone

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

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What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Why? Because racecar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops