Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

Why was the little girl sad? An elephant shat on her face

Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

hey i just met you and this is crazy... but loose my number and keep the baby LOL

Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

Why did the little boy tell his classmates jokes? To try and fit in for once.

-Knock, knock! -Who is it? -Me

what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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