What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

womens sports...

The economy.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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