The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What caused the man to become blind? He took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

thumb_up thumb_down -11

hola said the chinese man

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should? Fly halfway across the world when the environment turns hostile.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

do u like chicken ? ....no good...cuz its for black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What the the newly born male dog get for his first birthday? A loss of two testicles.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what happened to the atheist when he died? he went to HELL

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what's worse than a joke about the holocaust? the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

q ggggggggggggggggg

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are yellow Daisies are purple Tv drinks yes Why swing the door

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops