Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock! Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Miscarriages.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

you know what they say... hydrate or die

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

To the person who wrote the dislike joke: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH GOOD FAIL!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops