My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

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Q. What did the father say to his son? A. Nothing, he just hit him with his belt. His wife tried to intervene, but she too was hit by said belt.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Whats eight feet tall, purple, smooth, delicious, uses proper grammar, and likes dolphins. I don't know.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know but some black man is starting up his deep-frier on the other side

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? T get to the other side of the road

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Knock knock, Whos there? Your adopted.

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What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

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What's worse than losing your wallet? Having a miscarriage.

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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Why did the man cross the road? To get to the homeless shelter.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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What did one say to the other woman? I have a penis

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What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

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How you know that you are flying with a "no frills" airline? There are no meals or films provided, no orange juice to drink during ascent and descent and no mid-flight shop service.

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Why did the kid want to do his science test? He didnt, who would want to do a science test...

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Why did the purse kill a circus yeast? Secks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops