Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

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- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

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Why did Dean Jones talk to his car? Because it was Herbie the love bug , a car possessed by a demon that had voice recognition capabilities and thus could understand him

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

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What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

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Why'd the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a bus.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, you're entire family is dead.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

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The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

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what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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i lyk 2 eet pup

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What's black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops