How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

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How do you get a child off a swing? Throw a fridge at him

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

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How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

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What did jesus REALLY say while walking on water? "I really hope I find a nice patch of sand to swim in."

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I violate everyone that do not thumb me green, and vi0late the children, the parents, and the person of those that thumb me red... Its not about the sex, its about the domination... You might even like it...Your kids? Not so much... Well sometimes... Green thumb me, and I will... Meh, then you are awesome... friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Subscribe below, address tracker activated... LETS GO!

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

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A man walks into a bar, and sees another man with a huge orange head. He asks the bartender, "Do you know why that man has such a huge orange head?" The bartender replies: I dont know, maybe if you buy him a drink he'll tell you. So that man walks over to the man with a huge orange head and buys him a drink. He says to him: Excuse me, sir but why do you have a big orange head? The man with the big orange head replies: Well, one day I was walking along the beach and I found an interesting bottle. So I opened it and out popped a genie. He told me I had three wishes. The first thing I asked for was to have all the money that I wanted, and the means to get more. Suddenly, My pockets were overflowing with cash. So then I wished for the most beautiful, perfect woman ever created and there she appeared in front of me, and we immediately fell in love. The third thing I asked for was a huge orange head.

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why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Knock knock Whose there? 4

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Why is Satan evil? Because he makes people eat apples.

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Oh you expected a funny joke? Oh well

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What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

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One day little billy was wandering happily through the forest.He then trips and his legs disintegrate

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A duck walks into a bar and buys a drink. When the bartender comes up he says put it on my bill

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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what did the black kid get for christmas? I dont know....whatever he wrote on his wishlist.

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Why did the Nazi doctor drown a Jew in the lake? Because he felt like it.

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How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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