Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

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Roses are red violets are flowers jordan and me did it for hours If you know what i mean xxx

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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What do you call a cat with no tail? A Manx cat

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You do not, as she is blind and deaf, and partaking in doing so would be the morally wrong thing to do.

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Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

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Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Whats worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? 2 Holocausts.

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Nope, but yeah Felix looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, I think, nah it was Oswald the Lucky rabbit I believe, and he used to get his ass kicked by... Damn, what`s the name of the fat cat that beat up Mickey in steamboat willie?

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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I was thinking... Love conquers all right? Remember the epic crying video? Satan: Because... Some where deep inside... I still love you... God:BUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAAAAUuuuaaaahhh... (Partially invisible effect hand of Satan pats God on the back) The universe is at peace with no opposing forces and I am Nerometal, not that asshole that claims to have one fist and is the leader of some sect, I am and will always be the original Moralman, my name simply happens to be Nero, and thats it, so I am not dissing the bible, why would I none of my business literally, but if love can be tha powerful eh?

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What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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"your momma's so fat that she died in her sleep last night," said the doctor. "There was nothing we could do."

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I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

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Q: whats snoop doggs favourite weather? A: drizzle

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What's little and very sad? A 5-year old locked in a cage.

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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