A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

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What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy! But iI'm on bath salts and your face looks tasty!

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knock knock who's there auntie auntie who? anti-joke

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Why does Stuart go to Zu Bar? Because he deals cocaine to his fellow raving companions

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Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

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yo mama so stupid, she went to the super bowl an bought a spoon

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Q: How did the black man cross the Atlantic? A: He flew with an airliner, a large fixed-wing aircraft for transporting passengers and cargo.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see.

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What did the falling bridge say to the other bridge? Well bridges can't talk but if it could it, then it would say AHH! I am falling

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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Roses are red violets are blue hes for me not for you if by chance you take my place ill take my fist and smash your face

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Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

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yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

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What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

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A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

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Did you hear about the guy who broke his legs? His legs were broke.

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How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

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What's the difference between a cow and a cow? Nothing, they are both the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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