What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

whats the differnce between madalin macan and batman?...batman returns

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. On its way there, he got hit by a bus.

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

Why did the city disappear? Someone nuked it

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

Whats worse then getting AIDS Math class

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

Excuses are like assholes: Gay men like to have sex with them.

Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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