What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Q: Why do sharks live in salt water A: Because if they don't the die from blood loss because their blood-cells swell up and explode in non- salty water.

Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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