How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

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Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. Watching your attorney drive off a cliff in your new car.

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What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why did the boy Drop his Ice Cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

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knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

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Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

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What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

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knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

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Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

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so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

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Why did the jews get off the bus? Because i threw a fridge at it

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

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Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

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Why are Asians so good at math? because of their work ethic and determination to become the best at everything.rice.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops