You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

okay so one time my dog was eating an octopus tail and i was all like...Bro! octopus are our friends dont eat them! then he was all like okay...so later i saw my goldfish eating a blue kangaroo and i was all like bro blue kangaroos are our friends dont eat them and she was all like okay.. so then i saw my sandwich eating itself and i was like bro...let me eat you instead! and it was like okay. then i saw a bear eating you so i was like bro....thats all i said before it ate both of us :( and thats the story of why i have 6 toes on my left buttcheek

There was a man with a job and kids. One day he came home from his job and went to sleep. He never woke up because it turns out he had a heart attack.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

What's two plus two? Window

What did the woman say when she lost her purse? Where's my purse?

What Did Charles Manson Do For a Klondike Bar? He Bought One

What's worse than getting AIDS? Nothing.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

Wright flyer

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

Ich bin nicht der Anführer

"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

The U.S. economy is in poor condition and it's downfall would have repercussions throughout the entire world.

Why celebrate your birthday, its just getting closer and closer the death.

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What happened when the old woman crossed the road? A completely unrelated archery accident lead to the deaths of several people and thousands of dollars of property damage in another part of the country. The woman crossed without injury.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...