Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my legs Doctor: It's because you're blind son

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What has 8 legs and 1 eye? 2 chairs and half a fish.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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What did the Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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A goose walks into a bar. Maybe he should have ducked.

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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What's 9 + 10 19

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A storm be brewin!

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Multi Orgasmic Pillow screechers

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I walk into a bar...

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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What's black, white and re(a)d all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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BTW ANders she is gone, read below, seriously! And your mother is ugly, but she is so kind to me, so ill be nice to her too... Seducing a LONE WIDOW ME 32 years she... 180 and always blushing around me? Thats gonna be hard... No seriously, I kissed her on the cheek the other day, she moaned... And she aint that old... looks like a old 40 year old. ANDERS! AAAANDEERS! CHATTERTON!!! Anyway, tell your mom, that way Ill just need to enter, kill you, and you know... make her feel like she is ... 77 again? Nah she is ahornbag so she must be younger, wont kiss her on those lips though ANDERSSSss because she smokes, the others? Sure, Ill take a pic of her squirting! From the guy that taught you how to make any woman squirt... YOu fucking asshole!

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Why didn't the black guy get paid for doing work hard at labor? it was the year of 1860!!

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A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

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I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops