A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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How did Elmo get his show? Because the kids loved his furry ass and hoped to be on with dorthy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says "Why the long face?" and the horse said "My wife died of terminal cancer"

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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I have a friend named David. He then lost his ID, now we called him Dav

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What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

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Why did the white guy die because he had cancer

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what's more fun then stapling a dead baby to a fence? ripping it off

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What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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Q:So there's a black guy and a mexican sitting in a car...who's driving? A: The Cop

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anus

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What's red and blue and goes 105 MPH? A red and blue car.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

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roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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