A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

Why was the boy's face red? He put his cat in a blender.

What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

A large commercial airliner is piloted toward inner-city New York. The plane is driven into the World Trade Center by a terrorist. The United States will now issue a holiday to mourn all we have lost in this tragic event.

Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

What does it take to write a good joke? A punchline

What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

why did the kid drop his sandwich? his hand was cut off

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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What do you call A potato who is covered in red refrigerators and is known as a potato. Fallafal

Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

What did the white doctor say to the black doctor? We both went to medical school.

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

Why did the city disappear? Someone nuked it

James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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