Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q: What do you call justin bieber? A: gay

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's yellow, long, hard, and moves up and down? A banana in an elevator...

thumb_up thumb_down +32

chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down +32

"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Man: Doctor, everything I touch hurts. Doctor: Okay. Let's test it out by first touching your leg. Man: It hurts. Doctor: What about your arm? Man: It hurts as much. Doctor: What about your back? Man: It still hurts. Doctor: I see......your fingers are broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

There was a Indain and cowboy hunting together. the Indian put his ear down to the gound and said "buffulo come". The cowboy said he didnt see anything when the Indian said, "its Sticky!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Jellybeans

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why couldn't the white child dunk the basketball? His legs were amputated and he has been confined to a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

c======3

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops