What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

What is a chair?

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm wearing pants and I'm hungry

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks have herbivorous diet mainly consisting of wild grasses, berries, as well as agricultural crops when they are available.

Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

What do you call someone who copies a previously posted anti-joke without doing any research to see if it has been posted before? a lazy good for nothing rectum licking testicle sucking gonad gobbling arse bandit with narcissism issues

A black man walks into a bar. He sits down and has a couple drinks. When he is finished, he generously tips the bartender and walks out.

Listen pretty lady, NO WHAT WE HAVE BEEN DOING FOR LIKE SIXTEEN HOURS OR SOMETHING NON STOP STRAIGHT, IS VERBOTEN! Honestly, for me its a bit of a requirement, sure girls can go all like "But you are like friendzoned to me now", but then I... Hmm, you know, not a womanizer,my wife has the right word for it, I am a seducer.... Suddenly I do not like the sound of that, actually Its not a bit of a requirement, it is TOTALLY a requirement. Say, does it bother you when I mention my wife like at randomness?

What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

What did one pile of dirt say to the other pile of dirt?? You're dirty

A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ouch!" Later that day, the man's daughter takes him to the doctor because he's acting strangely. The doctor gives him an MRI and the daughter is told that her father sustained severe brain damage from the injury. Now the daughter has to juggle taking care of her father, taking care of a child she bore from a drunken one-night stand, and recovering from her meth addiction at a rehab facility, all while making minimum wage at her dead end job. Eventually she hangs herself, leaving her father and child to slowly die on their own.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a donkey

Bob:Know who's really stupid? Rick:Who? Bob:Your mum.

How much wood would a woodchuck chu... Forget this, this is overused.

Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

LIFE :(

Racial equality.

What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

What did the UPS man bring Sara? a box. whats inside it is only Sara's buisness

Your a bus driver, at the first stop, 4 people get on. At the second stop, 2 people get off. At the third stop, 7 people get off. At the fourth stop, everyone gets off. What is the bus drivers name?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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