Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

snooki

You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

What happened to him after he died? He got buried.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

A Muslim walked into a bar....nothing happened

On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

A man walks into a bar and says "I'd like a beer."

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick... Jack didn't make it over the candle stick and died.

Q. Why did the fat boy cross the road? A. To go on a diet

Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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