I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested? He was found guilty of two acts of murder in the first degree.

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420

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Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

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Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

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a man walked in to a bar and said 'outch'

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why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

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Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

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What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

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Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

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Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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I scream. You scream. We all scream. Because there is a rapist in the room.

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

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Why didn't the 9-year-old girl go to school on monday? Because she lived in a country where women don't have rights and was traded as a commodity for 2 pigs to be a wife for a 43 year old man.

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Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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