Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +25

whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +25

your mom died.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

So everything, the chat we had before was all you know, a game so I would call you? I am not sleepy but I can wait until you can confirm everything.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +25

"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

thumb_up thumb_down +25

whats worse then being a black kid with out a father? is not that bad it happens all the time

thumb_up thumb_down +25

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Guess what? I like trains.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was wandering because he was lost and got hit by a car in the process.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was the Microsoft fan happy? Because Steve Jobs died.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man is gay, a parade is held in his honor. A man is black, a holiday is named after him. A man is white, he laughs at the stupidity in the world today.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops