- Anti Joke

what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

Q: Whats worse than Coke A: Diet Coke

I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

You just made me realize something friend, and for that I am grateful, I quit and left the remains of what could have been put together again, I mean if the chance was there, I betrayed both you and myself by leaving a sinking ship. I keep telling myself that our dream has no chance of becoming real in a world where people lack what we consider vision, individuality. Now I realize that by losing faith in humanity accepting their individuality and becoming an author of fiction, I have indeed lost my own belief in a greater world, this of course being reflected upon the fact that I write fiction, rather than speeches and well, what I once considered wisdom. Its just that its lonely at the top, the wiser you become, the more alienated you become from the rest, and if others no longer grasp our concepts of wisdom, strength honor, love and such.. Then I suppose that we just end up lonely, as aliens in a world full of monkeys, until I have begun questioning myself if I am just an arrogant prick, and taken that for an answer. Then it does not matter if you have one follower or a million... ...The sensation of solitude, becomes overwhelming, I guess I have been looking around the world for a definition, rather than following my own heart. Listen, I wont pretend to be you, but I will gladly join you, but if you cannot accept us as equals, I decline. Hey on the brighter side, I always got a "man that likes men" vibe out of you, I suppose I got myself a fan huh? Someone trying to copycat me. Damn, I feel broken, or maybe I just realized how broken I have allowed myself to become, lets say you are not really a woman and where using this in order to break me. Then I gotta say you got me there, and I am not proud of that, I guess that you trying, where I gave up, makes you the better one regardless.

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So this beautiful woman goes to see her doctor and says "Doctor i think i have a fever." the doctor replies "I think I've got just what you need. open your mouth." The woman opened her mouth and the doctor gave her some Advil "This should help your fever. that will be $300." in shock the woman said "these prices are to high."

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You do not, as she is blind and deaf, and partaking in doing so would be the morally wrong thing to do.

What did the man say when he saw a purple cow? Nothing. He was blind.

What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

Sometimes when I'm horny, I put vinegar on my diick

What do you call a young man holding a banana? Well, this joke had quite a good ending, but as this site only has anti jokes I am going to change the ending. Because he wanted to eat it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

Q:Whats worst then finding a worm in your apple? A:Getting raped in the ass.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

How do you kill a cancer patient? Throw a fridge at him.

Why did the lady have a birthmark on her leg? Because she came out of her mother's leg.

Why is cameron haythorp gay? Answer- He showed his willy to robet tuner

Knock knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible...

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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