Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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My kids are mistakes.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Q: What did Robin Williams say to the young boy? A: Nothing, He is dead

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Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

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What happened to the guy who bought a nice, brand new, plasma screen t.v.? He hanged himself.

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Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

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Roses are red, tires are black, why is your chest as flat as your back!

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Guess what I saw today? Everything I looked at.

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What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

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So in Jimmy's school if u are misbehaving u are asked to get out of the room. Jimmy was in science, and he was throwing paper a bunch. Then his science teacher says, "Jimmy, do u wanna go out?" Jimmy replies "No thanks, I'm 14 and i have a girlfriend." That's how Jimmy got detention.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas eve? Hypothermia. What did the children get for christmas day? A traumatic experience when they tripped over his snow-covered corpse.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

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Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

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What's 10 + 3 x 22 ? Cake.

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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