The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

refridgrator

A cat walks into a bar. What's the first thing it says? Absolutely nothing. It was knocked out.

Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

A man walks into a bar, Esept it wasn't a bar and he was running.

What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

What did the man say to the jew? How are jew?

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

What's fourteen inches long and purple and can make a woman scream all night? crib death

knock knock who's there ?? the police now get out !!

If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

a pornstar comes early to a party

Q: What do you get when you cross an Elephant and a Rhinoceros? A: Merriam-Webster defines "cross" as "an affliction that tries one's virtue, steadfastness, or patience." This comedic exercise is one such affliction.

Q: Wy did the Araib cross the road? A: To open another gas station.

Womens Rights.

if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

Why'd the girl fall of her scooter? She fell into a hole and died. She was never found again. All that was left was her scooter.

A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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