Knock knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Orange Orange who? Banana Banana who? I have AIDS

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

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What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

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jcjdj

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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What do you call a horse with no legs? Useless.

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What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's worse than 10 babies in one trash can? One baby in 10 trash cans.

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Q:Which do you take out more...trash or recycle? A: Greenery

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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Why did the chicken protest? He wanted to be able to cross the street without getting his motives questioned.

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Whats similar between a grape and a duck? They're both purple. except not the duck.

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Whats the thing you least expect to find on Anti-Joke? A joke with a punchline.

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knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

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what is the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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