Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

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What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

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Why did the lion go to the doctor? He was hungry for man flesh. -John R-

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What is blue and not heavy? Light blue!

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

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a boy walks into the doctors office."my knees hurt...i poked it like this"the doctor says "listen kid...u are a really good kid but u didnt really injure your knee and im sick of you!!"

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? nothing cows cant talk. They did however, exchange glances while chewing grass next to each other.

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This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

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How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

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Chinese food tastes so oriental sometimes, sort of like asian food

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retaarded guy? A. Your retarded

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Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

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Do you like your life? No. OK.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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