What's the difference between a man and a woman? One has a penis, and one has a vagina.

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

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Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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A man walks into a bar.....OW!

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

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What did the 10 year old luekemia patient get for christmas? Dead parents

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

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What do you call a pair of owls? Two owls.

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Sally was ugly like a shaven babboon So she created her own little cacoon And within a week she finally emerged And she smelled like shit what a psycho

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jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

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Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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Man 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Man2: Are you a tree? Man1: no.

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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Why did John stay home from school? He died.

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Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

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squirrels playing in the street=dez bryant playing tennis

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what do you call a white guy on a bus load of blacks guys? probably his name...

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Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

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This is a joke setup.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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