Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

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What did the unappreciated YTPer say in the comment section of Nyan Cat? "PLEASE CHECK OUT MY YTP'S! I'M BEGGING YOU! YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!! WHY?!!! Q_Q"

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your mommas so ugly it is affecting her self esteem!

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How does one peel a potato? First I would suggest going to your local grocery store, and purchasing a vegetable peeler (although, in fact, the potato is not considered a vegetable). Once at home, I recommend disinfecting it of germs. Unless you already own a vegetable peeler, in which case I would simply peel the potato as every normal human would.

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What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating it's way out.

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What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

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A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

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Womens Rights.

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A terrorist walks into a bomb shop. He soon realizes he's in the wrong shop, leaves and goes on with his day.

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Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is your mom

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

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Cat got your tongue? Punch it in the face, and retrieve your tongue.

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Why can't Helen Keller hear? She's dead

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

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What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

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I was at the ocean, and I saw a screaming fish. Then it died.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

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I like pancakes. I like pancakes. We have no pancakes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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