What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

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There were three people on a plane, the plane crashed and they all died.

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How do 5 gay teenagers walk? In 'One Direction"

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I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

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What is Lil Wayne's first name? Wayne

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS UPS who? UPS, your package is here.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

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Your mama is so fat she has a high BMI and is at a high-risk of Type II Diabetes.

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What's the difference between red hair and black hair? Redheads vs. blackheads

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why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

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A man walks into a bar. The other one ducks.

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What is worse than falling down the stairs? Having leukemia.

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what did one mental hospital worker say to the other? Billy your not a mental hospital worker, give heather back her clothes so I can escort you back to your cell.

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Molest them

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What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

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WHat did REAAAALLLY Jesus say when, walking on, wat, er?, Will somebody please get me of this floating piece of ice? Please? Stop screaming HALLELUJAH! People: HALLELUJAH!

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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