What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. I prematurely ejaculate.

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What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

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Two rabbits are being chased by dogs and hide in a log in the forest. The male pushes the female to the dogs which are at both sides of the log and gets off Scott free.

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Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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how did the turtle die? it drowned itself

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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I saw a Chinese guy and a black guy talking to each other today, it gave me hope... For another rush hour movie

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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Gabe Mercado

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops