Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Why did hitler need glasses? Because he could Nazi.

Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

Guy: Im bisexual. Girl: Im thermosexual. Guy: ? Girl: Im only attracted to hot things. Which isnt you.

What do you get when an Asian and a black person have a baby? Black and yellow. Black and yellow. Black and yellow. :)

Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

Why do black people call white people "Niggas"? Because they took an overdose of KFC and watermelon, they're actually just insulting themselves.

A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

So a disabled man walks into a bar...

whats wierder than two lesbians kissing two homos kissing

How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

Vagina-Boob

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Garry Glitters on here

Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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