A man comes into a bar. Wait, it's a horse. A man comes into a horse.

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

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Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

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Make me famous

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

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Why was the man sad His got raped

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How do you stop an African outlaw who uses child soldiers? Angelina Jolie

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Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops