What did Shaq do when he first met Rondo? Play Basketball

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What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

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Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

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a chicken and a rooster walk into a bar. and then walk out because a bar is no place for a chicken and a rooster.

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Do you wanna build a snowman ? No.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

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What's purple and tastes like grapes? Grapes

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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poo

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i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

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What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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What floats in the toilet and looks like a log? A log.

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Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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